Politician, n. An eel in the fundamental mud upon which the superstructure of organized society is reared. When he wriggles he mistakes the agitation of his tail for the trembling of the edifice. As compared with the statesman, he suffers the disadvantage of being alive. - Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary. 1911.

A revolution is always legal in the first person, as in 'our' revolution.

It's only illegal in the third person, as in 'their' revolution. -- Benjamin Franklin

¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾ ¾

Time for some kid stories. Those of you who think my play is twisted and strange should understand that it’s genetic. Took our kids to see the local middle school’s production of Guys and Dolls. A great show. On the way back my 8 and 10 year old sons are asking me about craps, intrigued of course in only the way a kid can be by the name. I explained the basics to them, then, when we got home went upstairs to put the younger two to bed. Come back down and I find the boys in the living room teaching the dogs to play craps! They’ve gotten a pile of dog biscuits and another of chocolate chips and they are using a big set of dice we have and trying to get the dogs to put their paws on them and roll them around. Winner gets to eat the winnings. Of course the dogs think they should get a biscuit every time they roll a die and the kids aren’t too good about waiting to win to each a chip, so it may be a while before they’re supporting me on their casino winnings.

Next night, don’t feel much like cooking so Dad makes an omelet in our biggest fry pan (has to feed 5). The kids love the egg and cheese scrapings on the pan, so my son stands on his chair, leans over the pan and starts scraping away with a spoon with the expected 8-year-old vigor. This creates a cloud of scrapings which makes his eyes water. We’re all laughing at him when he calmly reaches back, picks up a pair of safety goggles from the chair behind him, straps them on and goes right back to scraping! I still have no explanation as to why he thought that he might need a pair of safety goggles at dinner (he did not know we were having omelets). Anyway, like I said, it’s genetic….

Game Openings:

Breaking Away: Brendan Whyte, Jim Burgess, Rick Desper, Mike Barno. Need a few more. Send me cards and team names if you are interested and if I have enough I’ll start next issue.

Gunboat with press: Five signed up so far.

Perestroika Diplomacy: Add an economic twist to the classic game. Centers generate revenue, armies and fleets must be maintained, and treasuries can be sacked! Rules are available on request.

Signed up: Art Schleinkofer, Phil Reynolds, Harold Reynolds, Karl Schmit, Graham Wilson

Standard Diplomacy: GAME START: Persephone (Diplomacy)

Signed up: Fred Wiedermeyer, Hank Alme, Cary Nichols, Graham Wilson, Karl Muller, Matt Sundstrum, John Power

Game Opening: Standard Diplomacy

Signed up:

Just the results please: Don’t really know what to call this one as I just came up with it. Perhaps it’s been tried before. The twist for this variant is that each season only the ending unit positions are published, not the orders. You’ll know who went where, but not who helped whom, or want may have been tried unsuccessfully.

Signed up: Phil Reynolds, Doug Kent, Graham Wilson

A new game for 3-4 players. Manager your factory and build your products, but beware, increased production means more waste, and if you aren’t careful you’ll find that working in a sludge pit affects your productivity and the bottom line.

Jim Tretick, Graham Wilson, Dennis Menear, Brad Martin

Railway Rivals: Anyone have a favorite map they want?

Brendan has volunteered his REVISED Victoria map.

Signed up: Brendan Whyte

Transcontinental USA: Eric Brosius’s variant. Now that we’ve play tested it once we’ll try again with a few modifications to reduce the east coast congestion a bit.

Signed up:

Outpost: Sign up for the next game to start when the current one finishes

Signed up: Eric Brosius, Michael Lowrey, Chris Hassler, Andy York, Kevin Wilson, Karl Schmit. Still room!.

Snowball fighting: Current game is over. Anyone interested in another go? 4 signed up so far, Need a few more.

Signed up: Tom Howell, Dennis Menear

Sopwith: Snoopy just started. I’ll start taking names now for the next game if anyone’s interested.

Brendan Whyte

Signed up:

Reader’s Choice: I’m open to anything, just send me the rules and if I think I can run it, I’ll offer it.

Scoring Cutler his final two even though he hasn’t technically crossed the line yet, we have a very close finish. Tom and Eric tie with 40 points and Jim pulls in third with 37. Hope you all enjoyed. Next game starts next issue, send in your starting cards and team names!

George -> Field: This was supposed to be the Summer of George!

Frank -> Boob: did you ever tell us who those guys are? I forgot.

Frank -> Field: I hope you all celebrated Festivus! (The "holiday for the rest of us"!)

(CUTLER to BOOB): We got it, boss, Danger Avenue is filled with delight for the team.

(BOOB to CUTLER): Yeah, but it wasn't enough. We are third, to paraphrase.... um, who was that anyway?

(HINT TO JIM: This is a team game and your team LOST just as mine did) so I won't complain.

(BOOB to TEAM PHYSICIAN): Why leave anything on the course? There's no point to that! You don't get to take extra points home with you for the next race.

GM – BOOB: Actually, the two lowest scoring teams get the credit for leaving the least on the course. Tom did next best by that measure.

(BOOB to RICK BABY): You didn't fare so well here, and won't catch me, but Zero Boy should keep his losin' mouth shut... well, how come Rumsfeld was his only point scorer? That seems like Bush Baby's biggest liability!!

MIKE to BOOB: We lost Ashcroft, but he was a liability; kept trying to redraw the racing lanes and finish lines. 'Leeza got a promotion and the dissenters were cleared out, so our evil still rules. We'll be controlling the election "reforms", so our evil will continue to rule indefinitely.

HOMEGROWN EVIL: I got the last rider across the line, if nobody falls off. But I didn't get last place in overall score in my first game

(BOOB to EIGHT BALL): Off the bumper back into the left front pocket..... SCORE!@!!!!

:Black Bottomed Girls (Brendan Whyte) 5 points

Homegrown Evil (Mike Barno) 8 points

Thin Bottomed Girls (Tom Howell) 40 points

Manager: Edith

The Four Kingdoms of Daniel Chapter Seven (Eric Brosius) 40 points

The Front Men (Jim Burgess) 37 points

Manager: Ian Curtis

The Team About Nothing (Rick Desper) 26 points

Manager: Frank Costanza

Welcome gentlemen to our new game. All of you except Cary have email. I trust that writing to a single player will not tax your penmanship unduly and you’ll harbor no prejudice against the Tsar for the poor state of telecommunications in his nation.

Due to delays in Jim’s printing schedule some players received the szine less than a week before the deadline so the game is delayed for one issue.