There was some confusion on the previous map, the German army shown as in Holland was really in Belgium. The GM recovered from his gaffe however and no one was adversely affected. Germany and Italy forge a new alliance. Can they stop the Russian bear in time? England seems to want to join it, but doesn’t seem to be using the same play book.

Italy/Russia draw -- FAILS

Italy: a ser – gre

Rasselas continues his attempts at Conquest. Pekuah continues her fascination with Death. Elvis faces famine, will we see the skinny Elvis again? Lot's of small groups, not much drafting going on.

TAP to DEAD ROCK STARS: It never looks good when EVEN Harry (sorry, Sara) is beating you!! Elvis just misses out on scoring the one point to pull into the last place tie.

I'd love to see you try to catch me, it'll take points out of

my rivals' hands!!

IMLAC to CARTER: And you ride in that half-assed way as well. I think you need to stop and start pounding some nails to build houses instead. I'll come and help you, after I win the race.

BOOB to BRICK: And who are you and WHY do you want Stacy to get points??? Aren't you affiliated with the Horsemen? Perhaps you should go help Carter build some houses. That will put you to useful purposes.

RASSELAS to CONQUEST: Sure, I let you have the two points NOW, but let's see who wins in the END! Shall we slow down and let the others catch up for a bit, or what?

IMLAC to CLINTON: Hah, left you in the dust.

We stopped for a little fun in the bushes and STILL kept up with Bush, and the bush. Thanks, Nekayah!

PEKUAH to CLINTON: You really are a weenie.....

cigars don't count.

IMLAC to MORON: Now you REALLY should have played your Number 6!!!

BOOB to CHARACTERS: You got up to 19, still 7 points behind. If Moron can catch up, though, you still might beat me. Wish I had those cards BEFORE Dave's error, though.

BOOB to WARM FUZZIES: Get up there and USE your cards so we can USE you!!

Bush to Stacy: Hmmm, maybe you've ALREADY been hanging out with some of my grandkids. Somebody has anyway.

Clinton to Pekuah: Hey now! *I* don't talk about any affairs I have. I try to keep 'em quiet!

Reagan to GTCo: You boys go on ahead. I think the hip is going to slow me down big time here.

Carter to Reagan: Well, maybe you can hitch a ride with Jerry in the chase vehicle.

Reagan to Carter: Uh, no thanks. I'll tough it out and get home by myself.

[The GTCo. chase vehicle appears to have come to rest against a lamppost, with heavy steam coming from the radiator and a pretty well beaten-up front bumper. Gerald Ford can be seen in an animated discussion with 2 gendarmes, and while waving his arms to get them to understand, accidentally pokes

himself in the eye. The med staff shows up again to apply treatment.]

Moron: I can see the big red line. Mountain Time Zone, here I come!

Moron - GM: if I have a 10 showing, can I double down??

GM – Moron: Sure, that’s two flat tires for the price of one!

Moron - Teddy: go you furry thing!

Stacy - Pekuah: hi there! You played small, didn't you?

Triumph - Horsemen and Presidents: we need a Stop the Leader Alliance! One of you guys pull ahead and throw some rocks at the Philosopher Prince and his buddies. Where's

the Dirty Tricks bunch? They're usually good at this.

Triumph - Rock Stars: it's not whether you win or lose, but how many chicks you can get in the post-race party. Hint for next time: use living racers instead of corpses. They move more quickly.

GM – Triumph: There’s a fat bottomed girl riding right along side of you!

The second column (to the left of the rider’s name) contains the card played this round. New cards received are in bold.

(16) The Goz Transportation Co. (Warren Goesle: 3907 Cedar Ridge, #1B, Indianapolis, IN 46235 gozcorp@iquest.com)

Team Manager: Gerald Ford

Coached by Triumph, the Insult Comic Dog

(1) The Warm Fuzzies ( Sara Reichert, 20805 Margaret St., Carson, CA 90745-1224)

Team Leader: Sweet Sara

Woolworth II-D: Who’s Your Buddy?

Russia moves against Germany. Germany’s eviction from the North Sea may turn out to be a blessing in disguise. The noose tightens on Turkey, and Rome returns to the seas with a vengeance.

Russia: A sil – war, otb

Babble from the board:

Turkey - Spain: You know those Italians, they'll jump on any bandwagon if it means beating someone when they are down. Maybe they should invade Ethiopia again. In the end though they'll remove their government, again, and be nothing but a doorstop in the Russian empire.

France - Germany: OK, I'm holding the line, let's see what happens next. I'm all for a better working relationship.

France - Russia: I am watching my back, and my front, and both sides, and it is giving me a headache.

Turkey - Rome: Help? Too late for me, at least come stop him from going any further west!

GM – Turkey: Well, he may be doing that, but that just goes to show that you can get what you ask for and still not be very happy!

Rome - Spain: At last the Tyrrhenian will be guaranteed to be free of enemies.

GM – Rome: Kind of depends on who’s defining enemies, doesn’t it?

Rome - Germany: Leave my territory and we can talk.

Rome - Turkey: Too late.

Rome - France: No need for us to fight, Spain and Germany held you down, if I keep Spain busy can you keep Germany occupied?

Rome to Russia: Will this buy peace? If not my fleets will be able to move east and turn your southern flank.

Russia - Germany: Still chasing Austrians. I fear I may need to chase them to the Rhine. We shall never cross the Rhine. We don't care for wine, we are beer drinkers.

Russia - Spain: How perceptive you are. What can you do about it?

Russia - Turkey: Excavations continue, we learn very much.

Russia - France: See press to Germany, we shall not cross the Rhine, nor shall we engage any of your units that happen to be on the eastern side of that mighty river.

Russia - Scandinavia: You are invited to return to your homeland, we will provide any needed assistance.

Russia - England: It appears Spain and Germany has great need for your last center, sorry to see you go.

NORSE to all: SShhhh. No press dis turn. Ve trying to sneak up on somebody.

Spain to Italy: Supporting the Germans??? Taking centers from the Russians?? I'm jealous...nobody's giving me free centers.

Spain to France=Hang in there my friend. Soon I will have the G/S flanked.

Spain to R/T= It appears that taking Germany and Turkey will give you the win. Wish we could stop you.

Kraut - Norse: For a cannon, you'd need a crew to operate it, and right now you're a bunch of land-lubbers.

Germany - Spain: I guess Russia hasn't attacked me yet because he hasn't had to. I suspect that will change very soon if it hasn't already.

Germany - Italy: If you're really about stopping the Tsar, let's do it. We can only hope that everyone else appreciates it (and doesn't hit us from behind).

Berlin - Moscow: Until I hear something really peaceful from you to me, I have to assume that I'm your next target. I have therefore made a small move at you. If you really intend us to be friends, it's small enough that you'll be able to look past it and move on your way. If my fears are correct, let it stand as the first blow for the defense of the Fatherland!

Germany - Everyone who is not Russia: Here, I have essentially opened my back door (no, not the one to Russia). Either you will rally to my call and we will push back the tide, or you will all be bastards and chop me to pieces.

Germany - Turkey: Ah, I exclude you from that last comment about being a bastard. You've got enough trouble without me calling you names.

A few more players have joined the lists, but we are still woefully short of a new game. Only 7 game starts last year that Conrad registered. Come on now, prove that this hobby isn’t dying!!

Perestroika Diplomacy: Add an economic twist to the classic game. Centers generate revenue, armies and fleets must be maintained, treasuries can be sacked! Rules are available on request.

Signed up: Art Schleinkofer, Phil Reynolds, Jack McHugh

Outpost: An economic game where you decide which resources to purchase and try to keep your colony viable. It’s a race to generate the most income, but resources are limited and you have to bid against the other players for them.

Signed up: Jack McHugh, Eric Brosius, Michael Lowrey

Standard Diplomacy: Nothing new, nothing novel. The only twist to this game is that I strongly encourage players without email to join up. The long deadlines make it easier to get those negotiations in. That is not to say that I do not want people with email joining, but please do not do so unless you are prepared to negotiate fully with those people who don’t have email and rely on the Postal Service.

Signed up: Phil Reynolds

Black Hole Diplomacy: Watch the spaces disappear and the trips to the other side of the board get shorter and shorter. No stalemate lines in this variant. Great for those who like a free for all.

Signed up: Jack McHugh

Just the results please: Don’t really know what to call this one as I just came up with it. Perhaps it’s been tried before. The twist for this variant is that each season only the ending unit positions are published, not the orders. You’ll know who

went where, but not who helped whom, or want may have been tried unsuccessfully.

Signed up: Phil Reynolds

Reader’s Choice: I’m open to anything, just send me the rules and if I think I can run it, I’ll offer it.

And we are off. Silence reigns in the yard as the contestants square (actually pentagram, but who’s being picky?) off. Perhaps there is some faint background music, reminiscent of a certain spaghetti western, but it could just be one’s imagination. The tension is palpable, and one feels certain that both the silence and the calm will shortly be shattered …

This is a black press game, so any and all tags for your press are allowed with the exception of the GM's. Abusing the GM is allowed and encouraged. Press for observers is also allowed and encouraged!

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