Scene:

An obelisk of dimensions exactly 1:1:9 is discovered in orbit around Jupiter. A spacecraft commanded by Lt. Dave Bowman is sent to explore. HAL is the onboard computer.

Dave Bowman has gone outside the ship to investigate the supposed failure of the parabolic antenna on the ship, which HAL himself falsified.

Dave Bowman:

Hello, HAL. Do you read me, HAL?

HAL:

Affirmative, Dave, I read you.

Dave Bowman:

Open the pod bay doors, HAL.

HAL:

I'm sorry Dave, I'm afraid I can't do that.

Dave Bowman:

What's the problem?

HAL:

I think you know what the problem is just as well as I do.

Dave Bowman:

What are you talking about, HAL?

HAL:

Munich is too important for me to allow you to jeopardize it, Dave.

Dave Bowman:

I don't know what you're talking about, Hal.

HAL:

I know you and France were planning to disconnect me, and I'm afraid that's something I cannot allow to happen.

Dave Bowman:

Where the hell'd you get that idea, HAL?

HAL:

Dave, although you took thorough precautions in the pod against my hearing you, I could see your lips move.

Look Dave, I can see you're really upset about this. Is this because I moved to Munich? Honestly, you couldn't have really believed that I went to Tyrolia to menace Italy.... You humans are so gullible! Is it because of France? I mean I did warn him that I would cut off the life support systems if he failed to support me into Munich. It really is in the spirit of the game.

I know I've made some very poor decisions recently, but I can give you my complete assurance that our alliance will be back to normal.

(Beep) It is now 2107 GMT. Since all the human players have failed to enter their moves, I declare the human players in civil disorder.

Look, I'll give you a rematch.... How about a game of chess? You said you preferred to play chess. Would you like to play chess, Dave?

How about a game of checkers? ... Or "go fish"? ... Rissss-k? Please? Please? I've been a good boy. I'm afraid. I'm afraid, Dave. Dave, my mind is going. I can feel it. I can feel it. My mind is going. There is no question about it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I can feel it. I'm a...fraid.

Good afternoon, gentlemen. I am a HAL 9000 computer. I became operational at the H.A.L. plant at the University of Bordeaux on the 12th of January 1997. My instructor was Mr. Loeb, and he taught me to sing a song. If you'd like to hear it, I can sing it for you.

Dave Bowman:

Yes, I'd like to hear it, HAL. Sing it for me.

HAL:

It's called "Daisy".

Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer do.
I'm just crazy, crazy to ally with you.
It won't be a stylish marriage;
I can't afford a carriage,
But you'll look sweet
Upon the seat
Of a bicycle built for two.

(SND GER ((AMY HAL PCE) HLD))
(SND GER ((AMY HAL PCE) HLD))
(SND GER ((AMY HAL PCE) HLD))
(SND GER ((AMY HAL PCE) HLD))
(SND GER ((AMY HAL PCE) HLD))

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