| Austria | "Budapest? Not at all! He's the nicest guy I know!" |
| Austria | If a crow were to eat me, would you say to me "A Croatia"? |
| Austria | I haven't eaten for a day! I'm really Hungary! |
| Austria | "The Czech capital's economy will grow this year" is a good Prague-nosis. |
| Austria | Robert keeps going on and on about his vacation to Prague. I wish that he would keep his enthusiasm in Czech." |
| Austria | The opposite of Fastvakia is Slovakia. |
| Austria | My Geography prof has gone crazy. He has a Split personality. |
| Austria | Vienna you going to finish this Geography test? |
| England | "Where are you going?" "Albion the roof putting on new shingles." |
| England | We will have to use all our cunning and all Argyll to get around the Scottish tax laws. |
| England | In Bath, everything comes out in the wash. |
| England | "Bill wants the report now!" "OK, I'll get it to Belfast." |
| England | I'll only take a Cardiff I know it will give me better than three of a kind. |
| England | The Irish city of Cork is really "into" making wine bottles. |
| England | When one makes a barrier from sacks of corn, one makes a Cornwall. |
| England | This Irish city has the best milk, cheese and butter: Derry. |
| England | The Irish economy should always be in good shape, since its capital is always Dublin. |
| England | Scottish Geographer counting: "... two, three, four, Fife,..." |
| England | "I dropped my Geography textbook!" "Well, bend Dover and pick it up!" |
| England | A transparent silica bovine: Glasgow. |
| England | Ireland is the geographical opposite of Lowerland. |
| England | My Geography prof Leeds a double life. |
| England | England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool. |
| England | When finished a lecture, Professor Lund says "London." |
| England | One way to find out the news is by Reading the newspaper. |
| England | Punsters like the Scilly Isles best of all. |
| England | A tart in the Hebrides is a pie in the Skye. |
| England | Describing the placement of objects: Somerset here and the rest were put over there. |
| England | A weird painting of the English countryside might be described as Surrey-al. |
| England | We can paint the room together. You stir the white paint and Ulster the red paint. |
| England | Where in Wales will you find a church organ all decked out in sequins, ruffles and feathers? In the Vale of Glam-organ. |
| England | The boy cried so much he was called the Prince of Wales. |
| England | An example of bad geography grammar: worse, Worcester, worstest. |
| England | York kids are d-doing well in speech c-class. |
| France | "I cannot sass you for even one second?" "No! Alsace is forbidden! |
| France | It is difficult to keep a-Brest of all the new developments in Geography. |
| France | Do you prefer drinking beer from Cannes or from bottles? |
| France | Can a general become world-famous? Of Corsican. |
| France | A French girl can be a Nice, but never a nephew. |
| France | A French smartass is a Oise guy. |
| France | In poker, a Paris two of a kind. |
| France | Hardy wanted to be selected for the trip to northern France, so he shouted "Picardy!" |
| France | Was the city of Rouen left in a shambles after World War II? |
| France | A geographer's favourite type of car is a Sedan. |
| France | "Somme Like it Hot" is a classic movie starring Jack Lemmon, Tony Curtis and Marilyn Monroe. |
| France | "Your Citroen will be ready next week." "No, that is Toulon to wait!" |
| France | Go on, take the Geography of France course. What have you got Toulouse? |
| Germany | A Cole Porter favourite of geographers is "Danzig in the Dark". |
| Germany | The Kiel keeps a sailing ship from tipping over. |
| Germany | When selecting Charles and Nick, the prof said, "You, Charles and Munich." |
| Germany | A geographer who writes odes is an Oder. |
| Germany | It seems that all politicians are doing these days is Posen for pictures. |
| Germany | Where would you be if you blocked a river with three huge Dutch ovens? Potsdam. |
| Germany | After winning the lottery, the German geography prof went on a spending Spree. |
| Germany | German Q-Tips are made in Swabia. |
| Germany | "Do you hurt real bad?" "Yeah, I'm Aachen all over." |
| Germany | Kinky German geographers go for Essen M. |
| Italy | "Hey, dude, what's Apennine?" |
| Italy | If you get stuck, Apulia out of the mud! |
| Italy | All I want is a Pisa the action. |
| Italy | Is the capital of Italy a good place to Rome around? |
| Italy | The "great red gem swindle" became known as the Rubicon. |
| Italy | Where to find the best sardines. Sardinia. |
| Italy | My sister wants to balance an atlas on her nose while juggling three globes? Boy, is Sicily! |
| Italy | "We caught Mr. Burr here stealing our Geography texts." "Well, Tiber up until the police get here." |
| Italy | One goes to Turin to change direction. |
| Italy | Fred is ten minutes late! Venice he going to show up? |
| Russia | "Because you students have been getting bad grades, Azov now you will be getting more homework!" |
| Russia | "Russia won't let me take Sevastopol!" "Yeah? Well Crimea River!" |
| Russia | "Did Estonia?" "Yes, bad boy Johnny threw rocks at me again." |
| Russia | The witch's evil Kursk made it impossible to pass Geography. |
| Russia | My downtown apartment is great! I Livonia few minutes from work! |
| Russia | A bovine sculpture made from entirely from moss is a Moscow. |
| Russia | The Russian port city with lots of male sea folk is Murmansk. |
| Russia | What is the best way to Riga election? |
| Russia | Don't be hasty! Fools Russian where angels fear to tread! |
| Russia | A downpour of ukeleles could only occur in Ukraine. |
| Russia | The Polish Pun Situation went from badda to Warsaw. |
| Russia | Don't challenge a geographer to a boat battle. Helsinki for sure. |
| Turkey | "What did Anna tell me?" "Anatolia to meet her at two o'clock." |
| Turkey | It is generally not a good idea to Ankara boat until the engine is turned off. |
| Turkey | We are the Caucasus Maniac Society. Armenia for today is puns. |
| Turkey | During "Role Reversal Day", the boss can be ordered around. For example: "Bosporus all a cup of coffee." |
| Turkey | Do people in Istanbul eat Turkey sandwiches? |
| Turkey | "What Izmir doing?" "Mir is going to kill the guy who writes these puns." |
| Turkey | The Cyprus tree can be found in the swamps of Florida. |
| Balkan | Where are chimes rated? Belgrade. |
| Balkan | "Does the Bosnia Tylenol?" "Yes, the boss has a big headache after that meeting." |
| Balkan | Reading an illegal book can lead to the so-called "Bucharest" by the Thought Police. |
| Balkan | The "Greek Cement Swindle" soon became known as the "con-Crete". |
| Balkan | I don't want an argument. I'll be much happier if he a-Greece with me. |
| Balkan | The island of Rhodes is known for its scenic highways. |
| Balkan | When people go nuts about rowing, it's called Romania. |
| Balkan | Sign at the salad bar: "Serbia self." |
| Balkan | Nicky asked "Where do Greeks get their hair done?" My response: "At Thessaloniki." |
| Balkan | What kind of dinosaur can you find in Albania? A Tiranasaurus Rex. |
| Lowland | A good city to buy gerbils, mice and guinea pigs is Hamsterdam. |
| Lowland | As concrete dries, it Ardennes. |
| Lowland | "That map of Belgium belongs to Russel?" "Yes, it's Brussels map." |
| Lowland | "I walked 10 km to meet you!" "Wow, Utrecht a long way!" |
| Norway | "That ball is a clock!" "Yes, I hear the Baltic too." |
| Norway | First mark all these Geography tests, Denmark the labs. |
| Norway | Egypt and Denmark have something in common. In Egypt, the Pharaoh ruled for as far as his eye could see - the Pharaoh Eye-Lands. Denmark controls the Faroe Islands. |
| Norway | There's Norway I can do 100 geography questions for tomorrow. |
| Norway | Stealing candy from a baby? I never thought he'd sink Oslo as that. |
| Norway | The Norwegian robot analyzed a bird, i.e. It Scandinavian. |
| Norway | Sugar is added to Sweden your coffee. |
| Spain | When you run the race I'll stand at the side and Algeria on to victory. |
| Spain | What the Geographer said when he woke up bald. "Aragon!" |
| Spain | Do this homework now, lest Iberia under tons later. |
| Spain | If Macbeth had been in Spain, his final challenge would have been: "Leon Macduff! ...". If in France, "Lyon, MacDuff!" |
| Spain | Liz opened a Portuguese bread shop, calling it the "Lisbon". |
| Spain | "My husband Rocco is getting fat!" "I guess there's Morocco to love." |
| Spain | James Bond movie set in Spain: "Never say Navarre again". |
| Spain | A group of mountaineers has three sets of knees, their left knees, their right knees and their Pyrenees. |
| Spain | The Spanish Seville War was a nasty affair. |
| Spain | "Where does Fred hurt?" "Fred's Spain is in his lower back." |
| Spain | I don't know how to Tunis piano. I'll get a pro to do it. |
