THE ABYSSINIAN PRINCE #345

February 17, 2014

Jim Burgess, 664 Smith Street, Providence, RI 02908-4327 USA, (401)351-0287, jfburgess of gmail.com

E-MAIL/WEB ONLY ISSUE! PDF will be available on the website. We also are being reproduced in Eternal Sunshine.

Web Page Address: /Postal/Zines/TAP/index.html

We start Diplomacy AND Breaking Away in this issue, the request was that we ALSO run Kendo Nagasaki, making it at least three games of it in Eternal Sunshine. Playing Kendo is as easy as pie, join us, let's get some new people playing. I have one name and location already.

This issue continues the szine/subszine inversion. As most of you know, this thing began as a ßubszine" to Terry Tallman's North Sealth, West George, then became its own szine with a host of subszines. The subszines remaining will appear as sub-subszines to our new flipflopped home in Doug Kent's Eternal Sunshine. Doug's incessant nagging is not keeping us on schedule, but will make it so we keep going. I'd like to keep writing and doing some game GMing (note that has been expanding). I'm set on the GMing, soon I hope to follow with the writing.

For production, in addition to the HTML's of each separate product on the web page, I will also have a PDF that you can print of the entire subszine (including my famous handdrawn maps!). You can just print the maps if you like, but remember maps are for pikers anyway, you don't need no steenkin' maps, keep them up in your head where they belong.

General information about the mailing list is at: /mailman/listinfo/tap You can sign up from there, or send E-Mails to: Tap-request of diplom.org; with the word `help' in the subject or body (don't include the quotes), and you will get back a message with instructions. You must know your password to change your options (including changing the password, itself) or to unsubscribe.

THE ABYSSINIAN PRINCE FEATURES SECTION (CONS/TOURNAMENTS/HOUSE RULES

((For upcoming cons around the world: /Face/cons/index.php, but note that some of the Americans have stopped posting the tournaments there. Shame, shame, shame... The last WACCon sounds like it was great, and TempleCon unsurprisingly was rather small, one board in each of the four rounds. But, as always, we recruited some new players to the FTF hobby, and may be able to use it for some more New England house games. Although we know that Carnage in Vermont will end off the Nor'Easter sequence of events the first weekend in November, the rest of the year in the Northeast is confusing. Cheers to Christian Pedone on the new family addition for him, but we're not sure if/when Philly Massacre will happen. And Rob Premus ended up cancelling out of TempleCon at the last minute, so we're not sure about his tournament either. But expect updates in this space...))

TEMPLECON 2014 REPORT

(First Round of Hoped for Four Tournament Nor'Easter)

Thanks to everyone and to the great TempleCon hosts, I reserved one crash rooms and three people stayed in it at various times. I think having a crash room is a really important part of helping travelers who come from a distance to the con. I did a lot of facebooking and trying to nudge people to come to this, including (as noted above) Rob Premus. But the winter travelers pretty much all went to WACCon three weeks before, and so the best thing about this convention was the new players we recruited. They played a lot of games in a short period of time. You can look up other information about TempleCon, but TempleCon still was a great party, and Maxine was in the bar again, so we were well served in between games. I need to get my crash room earlier next time so it can be in the hotel, rather than in the hotel down the road. Otherwise everything went smoothly and for the first time in many, many years, the Tournament Director didn't have to fill in and play any games. So I do NOT appear below.

FINAL RESULTS (TOURNAMENT DIRECTOR: Jim Burgess):

NAME

Round 1

Round 2

Round 3

Round 4

Raw Total

Adj.

Final Total

Randy Lawrence-Hurt

32.29

10.57

37.25

25.97

106.08

-10.57

95.51

Robert Rousse

25.11

28.19

16.19

17.32

86.81

-16.19

70.62

Carl Ellis

25.11

5.29

19.43

5.19

55.02

-5.19

49.83

Jay Aloia

3.59

1.32

8.1

31.17

44.18

-1.32

42.86

Andrew Katcher

10.76

15.86

11.34

1.3

39.26

-1.3

37.96

David Burgess

1.79

15.86

6.48

12.12

36.25

-1.79

34.46

Steve Cooley

22.91

Brett Deveau

1.35

6.93

8.28

Eric Tillburg

1.21

Here are the game results with detour09 basic points (in parentheses)

Round 1, Board 1

Austria (Brett Deveau):

( 1.35)

England (David Burgess):

( 1.79)

France (Carl Ellis):

11*

(25.11)

BEST FRANCE

Germany (Andrew Katcher):

(10.76)

Italy (Jay Aloia):

( 3.59)

Russia (Randy Lawrence-Hurt):

11*

(32.29)

BEST RUSSIA

Turkey (Robert Rousse):

(25.11)

Round 2, Board 1

Austria (Steve Cooley):

(22.91)

England (Andrew Katcher):

(15.86)

France (Jay Aloia):

( 1.32)

Germany (David Burgess):

(15.86)

BEST GERMANY

Italy (Randy Lawrence-Hurt):

(10.57)

Russia (Robert Rousse):

(28.19)

Turkey (Carl Ellis):

( 5.29)

Round 3, Board 1

Austria (Randy Lawrence-Hurt):

(37.25)

BEST AUSTRIA

England (Carl Ellis):

(19.43)

France (Andrew Katcher):

(11.34)

Germany (Jay Aloia):

( 8.10)

Italy (Robert Rousse):

(16.19)

BEST ITALY

Russia (Eric Tillburg):

( 1.21)

Turkey (David Burgess):

( 6.48)

Round 4, Board 1

Austria (David Burgess):

(12.12)

England (Jay Aloia):

(31.17)

BEST ENGLAND

France (Robert Rousse):

(17.32)

Germany (Brett Deveau):

( 6.93)

Italy (Carl Ellis):

( 5.19)

Russia (Andrew Katcher):

( 1.30)

Turkey (Randy Lawrence-Hurt):

(25.97)

BEST TURKEY

* Plays one short

@ Plays two short

! Plays three short

This is also the first tournament in the regional sub-Grand Prix tournament that is in its sixth year that we've dubbed the "Nor'Easter". The next two tournaments in that group are uncertain at this writing; but Carnage is November 8-10 in Vermont, now at Killington. We will again have a First Place Nor'Easter prize to be awarded and with more help from Robert Rousse (Carnage co-organizer) we should have Second and Third Place prizes as well. More on that to come.

Drop Dead Time Deadlines: These worked like a charm as usually, this is the way to play tournament dip, you're always moving, no waiting around while people write orders. The games really moved along, I again used my loud voice with reminders to people as needed, and people respected other players' space with need for order writing time. And the atmosphere was great. I ended up going again with the 17 minute spring, 15 minute fall continually running clock that gives more time for beer after the games.

More experience on selling Diplomacy on site: I was still not as successful as I would like to be here. These efforts generated lots of discussions but only two actual players. I did a lot of my usual tricks, trying direct E-Mails to Judge players and other players I could identify as being in the area, this again was not successful, but I will keep trying again. I didn't try walking around the Con playing Edi Birsan's Teaching Videos from You Tube again like I did a few years ago.... don't believe me, yes, I really, really did this a few times, but it didn't really gain anything but laughs, especially from the miniatures players, so I didn't do that this time around.

Although the TempleCon people are lovely, even this year having TempleCon not be on SuperBowl weekend still doesn't get the travelers that it might. We all agree that an early year northeastern tournament is a good idea, but we wondered if we should have just held it ourselves outside of a gaming convention. We will continue that discussion as the year progresses. The TempleCon organizers are guaranteeing me in the future that they will continue to hold TempleCon on a DIFFERENT weekend than Super Bowl weekend, likely the one after as they did this year.

Some time I'd like to run a DipCon or World DipCon. We're thinking maybe about a Providence tournament at a different time of the year, run by me, which is possible. I would like to plan next year, and then try to bid for something in 2016. I think Chicago is looking to host 2015.

DIPLOMACY WORLD CUP TOURNAMENT IS ONGOING - YOU CAN STILL JOIN!

This is the latest incarnation of this team based tournament. I am helping to lead the Nor'Easter team for people in the Northeast part of the United States. https://www.facebook.com/groups/123795024327261/ is the Facebook page for the event.

And you can sign up for the Tournament at: http://aqmn.asciiking.com/. Other US regional teams are the ones in the Pacific, Dixie, and Chicago. Its unique aspect, that is proving to be a bit distorting but in interesting ways, is its "solo only" feature. You advance from the preliminaries to the finals only by soloing, and then need solos in the finals against the other soloists. Though this started last January, it probably will be going on for at least two years, and there is PLENTY of time to jump in. As usual, for those who know me well, I screwed up my first game and allowed a solo to someone from team US. I still don't have a solo in over three decades, and yet again in my current game I'm not going to get one either. Yes, in C-Diplo, you can easily throw games, and in this format you can do it. I wonder why people like to drop the levels of the game in this way. It fascinates me. But in the finals of this tournament, it shouldn't happen, should it? The rules for the finals have been tweaked and the finals should start very soon. But you still can join the qualifiers, openings are there now!!!

THE ABYSSINIAN PRINCE LETTERS SECTION

Drew James (Thu, Feb 13, 2014 at 7:17 PM)

Dear Jim, ((Responding to: Syracuse gets by another potential stumble.))

This has been an absolutely amazing season! The Duke game was the best, most exciting, game I've ever been to at the Dome and I've had season tickets for over 15 years! Last night's game ending was incredible. It is simply unbelievable how great we are with the game on the line. We'll lose a couple I'm sure - hopefully none at home. We'll get a #1 seed and be able to play at Buffalo and MSG and if all goes well - get a second trip to the Final Four.

Drew, karelanddrew of gmail.com

((It may be too late for a February stumble, March soon will be here.))

THE ABYSSINIAN PRINCE GAMES SECTION

I am continuing to note cut or failed support orders with a small "s" instead of a capital "S". This will make it easier on the E-Mailed version of the szine to see what happened, since the italics don't show there. The italics DO show on the web page just fine. Since I'm not postal mailing the szine any more, I've dropped back to just reporting the disguised E-Mail addresses. As someone notes, if you need some more contact information, go back to past issues or ask me.

Standby lists:

Dick Martin, Brad Wilson, Jack McHugh, Glenn Petroski, Steve Emmert, Mark Kinney, Vince Lutterbie, Eric Brosius, Paul Rauterberg, Bob Osuch, Doug Kent, Sean O'Donnell, Heath Gardner, Paul Kenny, and Jeff O'Donnell stand by for regular Diplomacy. Let me know if you want on or off these lists, especially OFF given the new policies.

GAME OPENING INFORMATION

I'm going to start the game opening list over. Under the new regime, who wants to play what?

DIPLOMACY: The Regular Diplomacy game starts in this issue. I would love to run Spy Diplomacy again some time, any interest in that? Something else?? Another Regular Diplomacy game? Maybe I'll just show you all that I can stay on schedule for awhile.

SPY DIPLOMACY: Heath Gardner, need six more.

THE PHIL REYNOLDS MEMORIAL: 2006B, Regular Diplomacy

THE DUE DATE FOR AUTUMN AND WINTER 1909 IS MARCH 15TH, 2014

Fall 1909

AUSTRIA (Burgess): f BUL(SC) S f con-aeg, a VIE S a gal-boh, a bud-TRI,

f adr-ven (d ann), a SER S a bud-tri.

ENGLAND (James): f NWG h, a YOR h, f BAR S a nwy-stp, a NWY-stp, a den-PRU,

a STP-lvn, f NTH h, f NAP S FRENCH f tyh-ion, f swe-GOB, a KIE h,

f APU S FRENCH f ion-adr, f BAL C a den-pru.

FRANCE (Williams): f gol-TYH, f mid-WES, a BUR-mun, a MUN-boh, a VEN-tri,

f ion-ADR, a BER S ENGLISH a den-pru, f tyh-ION, a tri-alb (d r:tyo,otb).

ITALY (Crow): a GRE-alb.

RUSSIA (Gardner): a sev-MOS, a ukr-GAL, a WAR S f gob-lvn, f con-AEG, a gal-BOH,

f aeg-EAS, f gob-LVN.

Supply Center Chart

AUSTRIA (Burgess):

VIE,BUD,TRI,ser,rum,bul

(has 4, bld 1 (PLAYS ONE SHORT))

ENGLAND (James):

EDI,LVP,LON,nwy,bel,swe,hol,

(has 12, even)

den,kie,rom,nap,stp

FRANCE (Williams):

PAR,BRE,spa,por,mun,MAR,

(has 8 or 9, bld 1(r:otb) or even)

ven,tun,ber

ITALY (Crow):

gre

(has 1, even)

RUSSIA (Gardner):

WAR,SEV,MOS,con,ank,smy

(has 7, rem 1)

Neutral:

none

(Total=34)

E-Mail Addresses of the Participants

AUSTRIA: David Burgess, burgesscd of roadrunner.com or dburgess of glensfallshosp.org

ENGLAND: Drew James, kjames01 of twcny.rr.com or karelanddrew of gmail.com

FRANCE: Don Williams, wllmsfmly of earthlink.net ($5)

GERMANY: Marc Ellinger, mellinger of blitzbardgett.com

ITALY: John Crow, johnny.crow of hotmail.com

RUSSIA: Heath Gardner (aka Heath Davis-Gardner), heath.gardner of gmail.com

TURKEY: Fred Wiedemeyer, wiedem of telus.net or wiedem of shaw.ca

Game Notes:

1) The EF draw is rejected.

Press:

(A-H to FRANCE): Get your stinky French speedo bathing suits off my Austria beaches...

(FRENCH WINTER ORDERS): remove F-MAO or wherever it moved to...

(DAVID to DREW): Stab France now??? Please??? Pretty please??? What's it gonna take man!!! We got your back!!!

PRINCE OF DARKNESS: 2013D, Regular Diplomacy

THE DUE DATE FOR AUTUMN AND WINTER 1901 IS MARCH 15TH, 2014

Fall 1901

AUSTRIA (Allen): a BUD S a gal-rum, a GAL-rum, f tri h (d r:adr,alb,otb).

ENGLAND (Wilson): f nwg-NWY, f NTH-lon, a edi-YOR.

FRANCE (Williams): f ENG-lon, a spa-POR, a gas-SPA.

GERMANY (Kent): f DEN h, a ruh-BEL, a kie-HOL.

ITALY (Ruttinger): f ion-TUN, a TYO S a ven-tri, a ven-TRI.

RUSSIA (Slossar): f gob-SWE, f SEV S a ukr-rum, a UKR-rum, a WAR-gal.

TURKEY (Gardner): f ank-BLA, a bul-GRE, a con-BUL.

Supply Center Chart

AUSTRIA (Allen):

VIE,BUD

(has 2 or 3, even(r:otb) or rem 1)

ENGLAND (Wilson):

EDI,LVP,LON,nwy

(has 3, bld 1)

FRANCE (Williams):

PAR,MAR,BRE,spa,por

(has 3, bld 2)

GERMANY (Kent):

KIE,BER,MUN,den,bel,hol

(has 3, bld 3)

ITALY (Ruttinger):

ROM,NAP,VEN,tun,tri

(has 3, bld 2)

RUSSIA (Slossar):

WAR,STP,SEV,MOS,swe

(has 4, bld 1)

TURKEY (Gardner):

ANK,SMY,CON,gre,bul

(has 3, bld 2)

Neutral:

ser,rum

(Total=34)

E-Mail Addresses of the Participants

AUSTRIA: Scott Allen, scottdjallen of gmail.com

ENGLAND: Brad Wilson, fullfathomfive675 of gmail.com

FRANCE: Don Williams, wllmsfmly of earthlink.net

GERMANY: Doug Kent, dougray30 of yahoo.com

ITALY: Mike Ruttinger, mruttinger of gmail.com

RUSSIA: Bob Slossar, bobsloss of comcast.net

TURKEY: Heath Gardner (aka Heath Davis-Gardner), heath.gardner of gmail.com

Game Notes:

1) There was a lot of confusion over the Summer deadline. I'm not going to reprise the discussion here. In the end, all players submitted orders for Fall, and here is Fall. I do allow players (unanimously and anonymously) to agree to skip Summer deadlines where no moves on the board are required. There is a push for such a vote, but given all the angst, let me delay it a turn, we can vote on it with our Spring orders in April if someone proposes it with Winter builds.

Press:

(JIM-BOB to THE GAME): There are a number of press series going on, and for one of them, the one named PoD, I have been asked to reprise Part 5 to lead off this issue, this may help people read and follow it better. I think that is a good idea. So if this next item looks familiar, yes, you have seen it before. There also are two press items that are on another page since they are jpg's. Apologies that they break up the flow of the other press, but that's the only way I could deal with them.

(PRINCE of DARKNESS, PART 5): My conversation with Minister X had brought to the fore the unsettling reminder of another agent afoot in Europe. There are few in my line of work, and fewer still who are better at it than me or who've been at it longer. The Wicked Tinker. What kind of name was that? The Wicked Tinker was a new player, or an old player with a new name. Either way I'd never heard of him. Knowledge is power and ignorance is weakness. Not knowing was bad news. From his ability to counter my influence on Iago I recognized talent; I'd had Iago ready to invade Italy's former possession of Trieste and that certainty had been thwarted by the Wicked Tinker’s work. There'd been other signs of his hinderings as well. He was a risk to me and those I worked for. And not just Zander. He was an uncalculated aspect of the equation, an introduced uncertainty in a world that supported neither miscalculation or uncertainty. I needed to learn who and where he was, who he was working for, and whether or not to neutralize him. I'd need help with the first part and had decided to visit one of my oldest sources, the Gypsy Wife. She, if anyone, could give me the lead needed. She knew things no one had a right to know and would share them for a price, a price not always calculated in gold. On the way I'd stop in on Ajowan Dushing. I owed the old dwarf a visit and a payment and it wasn't wise to keep Ajowan waiting long for either. The springtime of war in Europe would take care of itself for now. I'd start for Switzerland in the morning.

(BOOB INTONES): And, now, we pick up with our story from there...

(PRINCE of DARKNESS, PART 6): The trip took longer than it should have. Trains everywhere had been commandeered by nations preparing for war. Schedules didn't seem to exist. Anxious troops headed one way, more anxious civilians heading the other. No way out for any of them. Everyone not in uniform seemed bound for Switzerland, making my own travel a slow affair. A telegram eventually caught up with me from Minister Zander. Some problem, he said, had been eliminated. An extra payment made to my account for my trouble.

War broke out across Europe on schedule. Armies and fleets from seven powerful countries crossed national borders simultaneously, a deadly ballet of guns, blood, and steel. I'd done well. As expected, the hostile major powers made predations on their less powerful neutral and unaligned neighbors; Moriarty invaded Bulgaria, Palpatine crushed Denmark, HAL marched on Iberia, and all the rest. Those which hadn't fallen in the initial round of aggression would capitulate by year's end. One or two might hold out into next year, but none would survive the war now roiling like black storm clouds over the entire continent.

There were a few surprises, too. Always happens in this line of work. HAL had launched an ill-advised expedition into the English Channel with no provocation from Voldemort. Dracula had not just repelled Sauron from Galicia as I'd expected, but had forcefully occupied the province, provoking the Tsar's considerable consternation. Strategically and dramatically, Iago had marched into Tyrolia and northern Italy, threatening Austria's or Germany's well-being, protesting friendship all the way. Classic Iago, I'd thought, and who knew where the Italian troops were really headed. I had to wonder just how much of that had been the work of the Wicked Tinker. I expected the summer and fall would advance accordingly from the brutality of spring as the villains controlling the capitals marveled at their early excesses.

(ANONYMOUS): "No enterprise is more likely to succeed than one concealed from the enemy until it is ripe for execution." Niccolo Machiavelli

(GERMANY –- GM): I never liked you.

(BOOB to GERMANY): I am more and more resembling that remark. I like to remind the players, that abusing the GM is highly desired, and you actually must abuse the GM as much as you abuse any other player. Thank you.

(AYN RAND-PAUL to RUTTINGER): See you at the next battle re-enactment. And remember - an apple a day keeps the death panels away.

(BOOB to THESE OTHER PEOPLE): Ayn and Niccolo? Where did THEY come from?? I didn't get their orders!!!

(LEAR says to SCOTT): So young, and so untender?

(SCOTT replies to LEAR): So young, my lord, and true..... except when it isn't.

(BOOB SPLUTTERS): Lear? Scott? Are we on Antarctic missions to the soul of Shakespeare? Must we bring back the voice of the Restoration??

(RUSSIA to FRANCE): [Wrings hands] Our plan is working! That forward button and the cut and paste functions are super useful in this game. CTRL C, CTRL V for the win!

(GERMAN ARMY to BELGIUM): Please put your hands behind your back and surrender all your waffles. All your waffles belong to us.

(BOOB WAFFLES WITH THE BEST OF THEM): I'll bet you all wonder what was happening as I was waffling? I'll never tell, I'm giving all my waffles to the German army.

(PRINCE of DARKNESS, PART 7): Ajowan was not in Zurich. I knew him to travel and change locations frequently so my surprise was not great. I was nevertheless relieved to locate him in nearby Kusnacht a few weeks later staying in the abbey near the ruins of Wulp Castle, a favorite haunt of his. Ajowan Dushing was a dwarf of the old school; he had a feel of medieval magic about him. He was a person of shadows and candled vaults and rarely ventured into sunlight. Of indiscernable age and odd dress of a bygone fashion, he appeared elderly but not old, an effect of lighting perhaps, or maybe something more. Like the Gypsy Wife, he knew things, important and arcane things. Unlike her, however, he seemed to know from firsthand experience based on a lifetime not measured by just decades. Impossible and unsettling, but impressions are impressions. I’d known him for many years and he was something of a mentor, a confidant, and maybe a friend. I was never sure of the last. He was also the conduit to those I worked for who did not pay wages. Obfuscated masters whose motives I neither knew nor understood but who occasionally sent word of missions of their own through Ajowan Dushing. Missions I undertook, usually with unanswered questions.

He greeted me with gruffly as was his way and asked me to dine with him. For most of the meal he quizzed me about my recent business which I shared truthfully as best I could, not lying but not detailing either. Our normal conversational content and one of which he seemed to approve, knowing enough about my activities but not too much. He asked what I thought of the war and I spoke honestly.

"The essence of life is that it lives by killing and eating. War is an ultimate extension." I sipped wine from my goblet. "The Great Powers will kill and eat until their leaders are dead or sated."

"Eh... you are brutal with your words, Cipolin Mondo. Brutal and wise. And your hand in it all is but the faintest touch to send life on its natural way, hmmm?" He smiled and tipped his goblet to me. Cipolin Mondo, his oldest name for me. "So tell me, why do you haunt the dusty chambers of this old dwarf stirring up fires with stories of villains and imploding destinies? What's on your mind, Cipolin?"

"Well, there’s the matter of an owed visit to inform you of my undertakings. No doubt you will share them along to - "

"You know I will and that's all you will know. Enough of that between us. And the rest?" He already knew, of course, but it was his way. I handed him the parcel, my payment to him for his most recent assistance.

"I think you will enjoy this, Ajowan. It is a gift to you from the Ottoman, although you will excuse him if doesn't know it yet." I spoke as he unwrapped the parcel. "It is the Topkapi dagger, delivered from the palace. Consider it on permanent loan to you, at least until you'd like to return it. I'm afraid the Sultan has been seriously misled to understand it was stolen from him by agents of the Tsar. Another source of hostility between those two, I suspect. Enjoy it in good health.” The gold and jewels of the dagger glittered warmly in the flickering light of the chamber’s lanterns. The old dwarf’s eyes lit up as well. For all his age and wisdom, Ajowan has a child’s innocent delight in treasures from the earth.

(DON AND DOUGIE to WHOEVER'S PLAYING ENGLAND): Get ready to face the double-D's.

(BOOB to GAME): I'd be really, really scared, if I weren't laughing on the floor at the thought!!!

(GERMANY – ENGLAND): Back in the Postal Dip days it was still possible to communicate with England. But I guess someone cut the cable that runs under the Channel?

(BOOB to GERMANY AND OTHERS): Anyone need postal addresses to send REAL letters?

(RUSSIA to AUSTRIA): You are "[a] knave, a rascal, an eater of broken meats; a base, proud, shallow, beggarly, three-suited, hundred-pound, filthy, worsted-stocking knave; a lily-livered, action-taking, whoreson, glass-gazing, superserviceable, finical rogue; one-trunk-inheriting slave; one that wouldst be a bawd in a way of good service, and art nothing but the composition of a knave, beggar, coward, pander, and the son and heir of a mongrel bitch; one whom I will beat into clamorous whining if thou deny'st the least syllable of thy addition." Get out of Galicia before I slap you silly.

(BOOB to KNAVES): Hey, what am I, chopped liver?? Stab me now!!

(GERMANY – RUSSIA): You have NO idea how many emails I received saying "PLEASE bounce in Sweden." So I hope you remember that I DIDN'T....

(PRINCE of DARKNESS, PART 8): "I thank you, Cipolin. I will enjoy the dagger, at least for a while. It will open letters without peer. And perhaps a throat or two as well, hmm?" He smiled again but I noted his mood had changed, the corners of his mouth turned up. Quizzical, I thought. Unusual. "You've not told me all that has happened in your travels. I sense a silence in your story, a missing interlude... something you've not spoken of that hints at a troubled soul. Come, share what's on your mind. Perhaps I can impart some thought or balm to help." I'd long learned not to be surprised at his insight, but still couldn't help but wonder a little at how he knew what I was barely aware of myself.

"Ajowan, I don't know how you do it. You're of eerie regard. Yes, there's something I have to take care of. A trifle, I think. In fact, I'm on my way south soon in pursuit of information."

"You are going to see her? Lila? That is a crooked path, Cipolin. You know this. She is... unscripted." Lila, the Gypsy Wife. Damn him and his knowing.

"She's Fourth World, Ajowan, like us. She has answers. I believe her intentions toward me are neutral at worst. She has been helpful in the past."

"May she always remain so, then. But be warned just the same. What is it you seek from her, may I ask?" His voice was thick in the light of the guttering lanterns. Dinner was cold. I took another drink of wine.

"There is someone else at work in the shadows of Europe. Another agent. Or something. I came across his activities while performing my own. I can't tell what he's up to or who he's working for. I need to know. He needs to be stopped or my own ministrations could misfire. My employer would be displeased."

"You know of him?" the dwarf asked.

"Only as the Wicked Tinker. No name. I killed twice for that alone."

(HANNITY to SLOSSAR): Good job sticking to the talking points this year. However, word to the wise. There's this guy named Lenin living somewhere within your borders and let's face it, the guy's a creep. A nitwit. A bozo. Do with that information what you will but I hope it involves the gulag.

(BOOB to HANNITY): I didn't receive orders from you either! I'll have to hold the game for Fall 1901 orders in March...

(BOOB to GAME): Never mind, Hannity wasn't in the game anyway!

(DIPLOMACY WORLD to GARDNER): HOW long have you been in the hobby? .... Have you ever won a game? You're fired.

(A REAL DIPLOMACY WORLD EDITOR to GARDNER): Don't listen to that voice behind the curtain... let's wow 'em with our interview!!

(SHAKESPEARE'S FOOL GRABS THE MICROPHONE):

Have more than thou showest,

Speak less than thou knowest,

Lend less than thou owest,

Ride more than thou goest,

Learn more than thou trowest,

Set less than thou throwest;

Leave thy drink and thy whore,

And keep in-a-door,

And thou shall have more

Than two tens to a score.

(BOOB to PEANUT GALLERY): I knew more Shakespeare had to be coming....

(PRINCE of DARKNESS, PART 9): I'd known Ajowan for decades but never seen the look that crossed unbidden on his face just then. As quickly, it vanished. But I'd seen what I'd seen.

"The Wicked Tinker," he whispered hoarsely. "I haven't heard that name in a hundred years. I thought him dead." A hundred years? What? "Cipolin, are you sure?" he said. "That name is old, even if the man using it is not. It is an adversarial name. Or once was. Where did you hear it?"

"In Venice. There was an unknown presence I noted in Rome as I was arranging Italian agreement to attack the Archduke. The presence slipped north and I pursued. I missed him in Venice but caught up to several of his associates. I didn't have a lot of time. The canals were convenient. They didn't know much anyway. But what did you say... what's this about a hundred years? How? Tell me what you know."

"I will not," Ajowan said abruptly. "I’ve said more than enough. Ignore my outburst. It was unseemly. You shall, do you understand? But, yes, this changes things. Go to her, find Lila. Learn what you can. Be careful there and guard yourself, she is more than she appears to be. There is evil in this news and at least one cold, dead ghost is shaking its bones. I'll set out as well. We'll meet soon and share our findings. If the Wicked Tinker is once more prowling the byways and halls of Europe there are those who need to know. They are always seeking photos of ghosts."

"I'll leave next week," I said. There were things I still needed to settle in Munich, maybe Tyrolia, too, and I'd need the time.

"That will be soon enough, I suppose," said Ajowan. The dagger glittered like something alive where he'd left it on the table. He lifted his goblet and drank the last of his wine, wiped his mouth with his sleeve.

"Be wary, Cipolin," he said. "The heads of Europe are not your gravest menace if this story is true. Play the fool with her if you must, but do not find yourself playing jester to the clown. I am away." With that he disappeared from the chamber leaving me to show myself to the door.

(AN ODE TO AUSTRIA):

With Regret, Trieste

Though I'd Rather Eat Turkey

Blame Moriarty

(CONSTANTINOPLE (AP)) - Despite his efforts to remain stone faced in front of his advisors, Moriarty broke into a wide grin. "Gentlemen," he said, opening his arms expansively, "Come and sit at my feet."

They did.

He continued: Öf course we did not expect that I would be outed in Europe so quickly. It was hard enough to get to Turkey in the first place. I'm an evil genius, not a marathon swimmer. If it weren't for the French spiriting me through Switzerland I never would have made it."

"But now that I have seized power and the world knows... It is time to prepare."

A stubby advisor raised his hand. "Sir?"

"What is it, Gruberman?"

"Do the people of Turkey... I mean, now that you've pulled off this coup... I mean, you're British..."

"Get to the point," Moriarty said, his fingers fingering the hilt of his sword. It wouldn't be the first time he had had to cut an advisor off at the knees for asking stupid questions.

"How are the people of Turkey going to see you as legitimate when you don't look like them, don't speak their language, don't practice the primary religion, and generally don't care about anything except destroying Sherlock Holmes, which... to be fair, sir, this isn't the best vantage point from which to take him on..."

"Guards," Moriarty said, very bored, inspecting his nails for cleanliness. The advisor was summarily hauled off.

"Now then," Moriarty said, Änyone else want to question me?"

The room was silent.

"Good. Now, defeating Holmes remains our top priority. However, he has been, to this point, successfully hiding himself in England."

Several of the advisors, particularly those working in communications, shook their heads with annoyance.

Äs you know, we have been going all out trying to reach the Prime Minister. However, he has locked down the country for communications to protect Holmes. This is sending Europe into disarray," he said, still unable to contain his glee.

He pulled a chart down from the ceiling - a map, full of symbols and indelible marks, covered in ink and notes.

Ï've been working on it. I think I have a plan...."

TO BE CONTINUED...

(BOOB TAKING THE LAST PRESS WORD): Just so the rest of you guys know, I have NO saved press byline, NO protection from impersonation, the press is as black as this heart of darkness. I tried as best I could to weave the press together and I think I grabbed it all, if I missed something, we can stick it in next time. More of you should feel free to join, I will be coming up with a set of press prizes (not just to volume) at the end of the game. The Boob nickname comes originally through Terry Tallman, where this szine originally began in the early 1980's. Those stories have been told many times elsewhere, but if you're confused about any of the press, ask the other players. They might explain it, and they might do so honestly. But read EVERYTHING in here with the proverbial grain of salt. I would also say, I like engaging in the infield banter, so writing lots of smaller press items is just as much fun. And, you never know, did ***I*** actually write this at all, or did one of the other players write it? You may never know.

FOR THE MEKONS ET AL.: Breaking Away, Designer's Rules

THE DUE DATE FOR TURN 3 IS MARCH 15, 2014!!

Turn 2: The Pack stays together, even more tightly

15 (replenish with a 3)

Moist von Lipwig, Mustrum Ridcully, Roberto Rojas, Jean Van de

Velde, Barszczewski

14 (replenish with a 8)

Sylvester Carmouche, Floyd Little, Crockett

13 (replenish with a 11)

Sam Vimes, Jim Brown, Arciszewski, Cwierczakiewiczowa

12 (replenish with a 15)

CMOT Dibbler, Ryan Leaf, Ernie Davis

11 (replenish with a 18)

Katniss Everdeen, Bowie, Houston

10 (replenish with a 21)

Larry Csonka, Haymitch Abernathy, Dziewulski, Travis

9 (replenish with a 25)

Effie Trinket

8 (replenish with a 26)

Peeta Mellark

Addresses of the Participants - Their Team and Their Cards

TEAM 1 (Hank Alme): cobblers of gmail.com (0 points)

Team Name: Vetinari's Terriers; TEAM CAPTAIN: Sam Vimes

A: Moist von Lipwig

(7) 9, 13, 3

B: Mustrum Ridcully

(8) 10, 10, 3

C: Sam Vimes

(8) 7, 15, 11

D: CMOT Dibbler

(7) 4, 15, 15

Total Replenishments: 47 + 32 = 79

TEAM 2 (Andy Bate): andydbate of gmail.com (0 points)

Team Name: Racing Froggy; TEAM CAPTAIN: Jean Van de Velde

A: Jean Van de Velde

(4) 14, 5, 3

B: Roberto Rojas

(3) 7, 6, 3

C: Sylvester Carmouche

(4) 6, 5, 8

D: Ryan Leaf

(3) 4, 6, 15

Total Replenishments: 18 + 29 = 47

TEAM 3 (David Burgess): burgesscd of roadrunner.com or dburgess of glensfallshosp.org (0 points)

Team Name: Syracuse Orangemen

A: Ernie Davis

(9) 3, 15, 21, 15

B: Jim Brown

(9) 12, 19, 11

C: Floyd Little

(9) 6, 15, 8

D: Larry Csonka

(9) 6, 24, 21

Total Replenishments: 79 + 55 = 84

TEAM 4 (Rick Desper): rick_desper of yahoo.com (0 points)

Team Name: District 12

A: Katniss Everdeen

(10) 4, 15, 24, 18

B: Haymitch Abernathy

(7) 15, 21, 21

C: Peeta Mellark

(6) 12, 23, 26

D: Effie Trinket

(8) 7, 24, 25

Total Replenishments: 92 + 90 = 182

TEAM 5 (Brendan Whyte): BWHYTE of nla.gov.au (0 points)

Team Name: The Reverse Polish Notationists (a.k.a. The Unpronounceables)

A: Arciszewski

(7) 9, 8, 12, 11

B: Barszczewski

(7) 9, 8, 3

C: Cwierczakiewiczowa

(7) 7, 12, 11

D: Dziewulski

(6) 6, 19, 21

Total Replenishments: 50 + 46 = 96

TEAM 6 (Andy York): (0 points)

Team Name: Team Alamo

A: Travis

(4) 11, 9, 12, 21

B: Crockett

(6) 11, 7, 8

C: Bowie

(4) 9, 10, 18

D: Houston

(6) 5, 15, 18

Total Replenishments: 44 + 65 = 109

Game Notes:

1) The rules are on the TAP website in the Tinamou section. Ask if you have any questions. Rules at:

/Postal/Zines/TAP/Tinamou/rules/BreakingAway.htm

Up above in parentheses is the card you played to get to where you are in the field. The replenishment card is the last card in your list. Be careful to note that the card you played (the one in parentheses) is not available for you, for next turn. Just for fun, I keep track of total replenishment, by turn, which is a rough measure of how the teams are doing. Of course, it is lining up to get across the sprint (40/80) and final (120) lines in the right places that really counts. We can calculate an "efficiency score" later, which will be the ratio of scoring points per replenishment. If I'm predicting how the future of this will come out based on doing this before, about half the players will get scores below 5% and getting better than a 10% score will be really tremendous for this measure.

2) Yes, the pelaton stays together again, and if anything gets a little tighter. We'll see if it can do that again. One would guess that it can't, but we shall see. A reminder that the sprint line comes AFTER 40, so you have to get to 41 to score points.

Press:

(a cannon goes off, a photo of Plutarch Heavensbee appears in the sky) Caesar Flickerman: the race has started well, but we have sad news for gaming fans out there. Our Games Maker, Plutarch Heavensbee, has succumbed to some poisoned berries. He will be sorely missed.

(RIP Philip Seymour Hoffman 1967 - 2014)

WHERE IN THE WORLD IS KENDO NAGASAKI

THE DUE DATE FOR TURN 2 IS MARCH 15, 2014!!

So, for numbers of Kendo Nagasaki games in Eternal Sunshine why stop with two, let's go for three? It might be fun if Doug made it a requirement of subszinehood. Just kidding there, but anyway, we're joining the parade. I'd like to get more people engaged, not just the usual suspects from Doug's games. The full rules for Where in the World is Kendo Nagasaki are in: http://www.whiningkentpigs.com/DW/es58.pdf. The player who was closest has been notified by E-Mail.

TURN 1

Brendan Whyte:

Tom Howell:

Diana Rigg in Anchorage, Alaska

Rex Roberts in Alexandria, Egypt

Heath Gardner:

Doug Kent:

Jimmy "the Greek" in Las Vegas, NV

Charlton Heston in Rome, Italy

Rick Desper:

Kevin Wilson:

Eddie "the Eagle" Edwards in Sochi, Russia

Pierre Trudeau in Montevideo, Uruguay

Hank Alme:

Mike Ruttinger

Ian Fleming in Tegucigalpa, Honduras

George McArthur in Seoul, South Korea

HINT to the Person with the Closest Geographic Guess: Unfortunately, you are very much dead, while I am very much alive.

LAST WORD:
I hope everyone enjoys and engages with this issue. I think I got everything right, though it took awhile. I would note for the future that I sort of give myself a week to get this out to match up with Doug's deadline. But I think this Prince of Darkness crowd is going to keep demanding Sunday releases. I've dated this tomorrow since it is evening here, but Monday in London.

File translated from T_EX by T_TH, version 3.85.
On 16 Feb 2014, 20:32.